I was cleaning out my cabinets and found a box of Shake 'N Bake. It reminded me of a somewhat humorous exchange I had with Kraft Foods, Inc. and I thought I'd share it with you:
A while back, I got on a kick where I was breading tofu with Shake 'N Bake Hot and Spicy and then baking the heck out of it. At first glance, Shake 'N Bake seemed like it was vegetarian, but I'm a label reader and I just wanted to be 100% sure I wasn't consuming beef or chicken.
So, I sent this simple comment in on Kraft's Web site, thinking I'd get my answer, and then shake 'n bake to my heart's content:
"I am a vegetarian and would like to use your Shake N'Bake products to coat tofu before I bake it. do the natural flavors include non-vegetarian components?"
And here was the response:
"Hi ________,
Thank you for visiting http://www.kraftfoods.com/. I'm glad to share some information with you about the "natural vegetarian flavors" used in SHAKE 'N BAKE(r) Seasoned Coating Mix.The term natural vegetarian flavors means that all flavor components are both all natural and of vegetable origin. While we are not at liberty to reveal specific details regarding product formulations, please be assured that our products are formulated to meet the specific needs of vegetarians and natural food consumers.If you haven't done so already, please add our site to your favorites and visit us again soon!
Kim
Associate Director, Consumer Relations"
Okay...but that didn't answer my question. So, I tried to get the clarification I needed:
"Thank you for your response.
I want to clarify that the ingredients do not say "natural vegetarian flavors." They say "natural flavors." I want to make certain that "natural" does not mean meat/chicken/animal derived.
Can you please verify?
Thank you!"
And Kim cheerfully replied:
"Hi ________,
Thank you for visiting http://www.kraftfoods.com/.
I'd be glad to help explain the labeling of the spices and natural flavors used in our products. Spices which may be declared by name or included under the term spices on the ingredients label include the following: Allspice, Anise, Basil, Bay leaves, Caraway seed, Cardamon, Celery seed, Chervil, Cinnamon, Cloves, Coriander, Cumin seed, Dill seed, Fennel Seed, Fenugreek, Ginger, Horseradish, Mace, Marjoram, Mustard flour, Nutmeg, Oregano, Paprika, Parsley, Pepper (black, white, or red), Rosemary, Saffron, Sage, Savory, Star aniseed, Tarragon, Thyme and Turmeric. Garlic and onion aren't included under the term "spices" on an ingredient label.
All of our food labeling is in accordance with strict United States government regulations.
A natural flavor must come from a natural source and can't be synthetically manufactured. Examples of natural flavorings include lemon oil, almond extract and garlic extract. Because of the sensitive nature of the formulas for our products, information regarding the specific spices and/or natural flavorings is considered confidential. Of course, all of our food labeling is in accordance with strict United States government regulations.
Again, thanks for contacting us, and I hope you'll continue to enjoy our products.
Kim
Associate Director, Consumer Relations"
What the heck, Kim? Are you a robot? Can't you just tell me what I'm eating?
"Dear Kim,
But you can't tell me if the natural flavor is vegetarian? With all due respect, the translation is - I want to use your product, but I don't want to consume MEAT! If it has chicken or beef or fish, then I can't buy it.
I want to recommend it to fellow vegetarians, but I can't, if it has meat in it.
I just want to know if I can use Shake N' Bake Hot and Spicy, that's all. I'm not trying to recreate your recipe.
Can you please provide me with a "YES, it's vegetarian" or "NO, it's not vegetarian" answer?
Many thanks,
___________"
And here is where Kim politely tells me "tough toenails":
"Hi ______,
Thank you for visiting http://www.kraftfoods.com/.
I understand that knowing what ingredients are in the food products you eat directly affect how you practice your dietary lifestyle, and Kraft Foods does all that it can to assist its consumers in making educated food decisions.
I apologize but unfortunately this ingredient information is not currently available.
As you can imagine our products change frequently, and maintaining a list of products for specific dietary practices would be virtually impossible.
If you haven't done so already, please add our site to your favorites and visit us again soon!
Kim
Associate Director, Consumer Relations"
Do you think Kim was gritting her teeth when she thanked me for visiting their site...again?! Do you think she really wanted me to add their site to my favorites? Just sayin'...
So...are you as freaked out as I am that no one at Kraft knows what is included in their products? This scares me a little! Natural flavors...do the sweepings that usually get whisked into the dust pan count as natural flavors? How about sand?
Needless to say, I haven't Shaked N' Baked since. Which is why the lone packet of S'NB was up in my cabinet when I put groceries away last night...
Friday, December 4, 2009
Thursday, December 3, 2009
I Wish I May...
No one knows this...
When I was little, I'd stand on my bed and look out the window at night when I was supposed to be sleeping. I could feel the cool air coming through the frame of the glass - we lived in a starter house and the windows were just barely there. I would look out into the dark at the lights way far away and I'd pretend the convenience store and town lights were stars.
"Star light, star bright..."
I imagined the life I'd one day have. A life where I wouldn't be awkward, where I'd be able to drive a car, where I could put on pretty clothes and makeup and not be the scrawny class nerd. A life without an angry father. A life where I could sing and dance and be famous, like Donnie & Marie. A life where I could, I could, I could...
Fast forward to tonight. I'm wishing again.
This evening, I put up the Christmas decorations. They're simple and modest and I love that. I mean, really simple - it takes me a whole half hour to prepare for the Holidays. But Mom and my Step Dad and Steinvic will all be here this weekend and I thought, Christmas decorations would be just right, even if it's only early December.
I think Steinvic likes that I handle the decorating. I considered waiting until he got here so that we could decorate together, but I thought it would be kind of magical if everything was just so when he comes home.
So, my wishes are different now. I wish that Steinvic loves the warmth and sparkle whe he gets here tomorrow. I wish that I will be a good wife and that Steinvic always thinks I'm beautiful. I wish that I'm always the best version of myself that I can be. I wish that the things which once challenged my strength will truly make me the most stable, strong, capable person I could imagine. I wish that if I live to be 91, I look back and feel I've been half the woman my Grandma was. Oh, how I wish I could see her this Christmas...
I wish.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Happy December! (And can you spare $5?)
Happy December 1, Party People! I hope you had an awesome Thanksgiving...we certainly did. Almost all of Steinvic's siblings made it to our family celebration and it was great fun, as always. (How I love these people!) Most had not seen us since our engagement, so it was really fun and exciting.
I spent most of the weekend cheerfully sewing small mice for Holiday gifts, cooking and relaxing with Steinvic. And sleeping. (I have no idea what is up with the sleeps, but I can't seem to get enough of them...highly unusual for me.) I'll post some mice photos here in the next day or so. I'm considering making a bunch of them through the next year and opening up an Etsy shop...
At work, we've adopted a large, single-parent family for the Holidays. This year, our family consists of a Mom and nine children, ages 1 through 14. (I know what some of you might think...why would someone impoverished have all these children and then have the nerve to ask for help? Well, we don't know how she happened into that situation, do we? We don't know if all the children are hers, if she is fostering, just lost her husband or partner, or what...so...relax.)
As a team, we used to buy each other ornaments or treats and found that with ten of us, we could each easily spend close to $100 on nothing. Then we realized that our accumulated funds could really help someone. So, in the Spirit of the Season, we adopt a family, we don't judge or ask questions, and we try to make sure that we provide as much food and home goods as possible, with the hope that it will last them a few months. The last few years, we've shipped off 20 boxes (the boxes are those that reams of printer paper come in) of goods to our families. I signed up for "items that can't be bought with food stamps" - cleaning, personal care items, laundry supplies and paper products.
Every year, I stay around to help number and pack the boxes, and every year, I get this big giant lump in my throat while packing up. It's not because we're doing this great thing...it's that for this one family who will receive a drop in the bucket, there are hundreds of thousands of others who don't have the resources to get help, who won't have food, new blankets or a $2 box of crayons under the tree. And it's not just for the Holidays, but for everyday...they will struggle.
I've had an interesting life, and in that life, I've gone hungry at times. There were brief periods of no heat, a box of rice to last a week, or bread and peanut butter for days (and days.) But I still can't imagine a fear that there was no end to that hunger, or the feeling of no hope, of no love, of true solitude. I always knew it would get better and with hard work, resourcefulness and luck, it did.
Maybe you can help change someone's outlook this winter. If you have an extra $5 - and I know that times are tough, trust me - would you consider purchasing and donating some food to your local food bank? Check to see if your employer sponsors a program, or your local grocery. If not, maybe you have some spare time on your hands to coordinate something?
I wish for you and your family to have all you need to eat and stay warm this winter. And I wish for you that the Spirit of the Season moves you to do something for someone random...someone who could use a little cheer.
I spent most of the weekend cheerfully sewing small mice for Holiday gifts, cooking and relaxing with Steinvic. And sleeping. (I have no idea what is up with the sleeps, but I can't seem to get enough of them...highly unusual for me.) I'll post some mice photos here in the next day or so. I'm considering making a bunch of them through the next year and opening up an Etsy shop...
At work, we've adopted a large, single-parent family for the Holidays. This year, our family consists of a Mom and nine children, ages 1 through 14. (I know what some of you might think...why would someone impoverished have all these children and then have the nerve to ask for help? Well, we don't know how she happened into that situation, do we? We don't know if all the children are hers, if she is fostering, just lost her husband or partner, or what...so...relax.)
As a team, we used to buy each other ornaments or treats and found that with ten of us, we could each easily spend close to $100 on nothing. Then we realized that our accumulated funds could really help someone. So, in the Spirit of the Season, we adopt a family, we don't judge or ask questions, and we try to make sure that we provide as much food and home goods as possible, with the hope that it will last them a few months. The last few years, we've shipped off 20 boxes (the boxes are those that reams of printer paper come in) of goods to our families. I signed up for "items that can't be bought with food stamps" - cleaning, personal care items, laundry supplies and paper products.
Every year, I stay around to help number and pack the boxes, and every year, I get this big giant lump in my throat while packing up. It's not because we're doing this great thing...it's that for this one family who will receive a drop in the bucket, there are hundreds of thousands of others who don't have the resources to get help, who won't have food, new blankets or a $2 box of crayons under the tree. And it's not just for the Holidays, but for everyday...they will struggle.
I've had an interesting life, and in that life, I've gone hungry at times. There were brief periods of no heat, a box of rice to last a week, or bread and peanut butter for days (and days.) But I still can't imagine a fear that there was no end to that hunger, or the feeling of no hope, of no love, of true solitude. I always knew it would get better and with hard work, resourcefulness and luck, it did.
Maybe you can help change someone's outlook this winter. If you have an extra $5 - and I know that times are tough, trust me - would you consider purchasing and donating some food to your local food bank? Check to see if your employer sponsors a program, or your local grocery. If not, maybe you have some spare time on your hands to coordinate something?
I wish for you and your family to have all you need to eat and stay warm this winter. And I wish for you that the Spirit of the Season moves you to do something for someone random...someone who could use a little cheer.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Fair & Square
I redeemed myself!
Last night I beat my phone at Scrabble, fair and square.
Vanquish. That was the word that won the game for me. Ah, sweet victory...
Last night I beat my phone at Scrabble, fair and square.
Vanquish. That was the word that won the game for me. Ah, sweet victory...
Monday, November 23, 2009
A New Low - I Cheated at Scrabble
I downloaded the Scrabble game to my phone on Friday. I don't know just what made me feel compelled to do it but I did it. For $7.99, I have unlimited access to Phone Scrabble forever and ever. My Grandma was a HUGE, kick butt, cut throat Scrabble player and since I love word games, I thought it would be fun.
On the Easy level, I won several times. "I won! I beat the computer! Whoo hoo!" I told Steinvic.
"Great! What level is it on?" Steinvic asked.
Grrrrrrrr... "Easy," I confessed, going to the settings and upping the difficulty level.
Since then, I've played about five games, and that flipping computer beats me everytime! I mean, I get rid of all my tiles, but my words are baby talk compared with the computer's vocabulary.
So, I had this combination of letters: mgipear. And then, got an evil, wise idea to descramble them here and see if I could make one big fat word out of as many of those letters as possible! HA!
And guess what? It came back with "epigram" and there was a place for that word to butt up against an "s" and make "epigrams!" So I did. I used all my tiles and it was like a 98 point word or something ridiculous like that.
I laughed my evil, underworld laugh and then instantly felt guilty.
The computer must have felt pretty bad, too, because it started spelling easy, sucky words like, "cat," and "for."
So I won. I finally "Won on the Medium Level!" And I did it by cheating.
Who cheats on Phone Scrabble? I've never cared about winning in my life, just having fun! But there was something about being referred to as "Player 1" instead of by name. Something about the phone relentlessly winning with no apology. Something about the glare of the crimson screen...
Enough. I need to get a life. And do some word game practice thingies to build up my vocabulary. Geez...
On the Easy level, I won several times. "I won! I beat the computer! Whoo hoo!" I told Steinvic.
"Great! What level is it on?" Steinvic asked.
Grrrrrrrr... "Easy," I confessed, going to the settings and upping the difficulty level.
Since then, I've played about five games, and that flipping computer beats me everytime! I mean, I get rid of all my tiles, but my words are baby talk compared with the computer's vocabulary.
So, I had this combination of letters: mgipear. And then, got an evil, wise idea to descramble them here and see if I could make one big fat word out of as many of those letters as possible! HA!
And guess what? It came back with "epigram" and there was a place for that word to butt up against an "s" and make "epigrams!" So I did. I used all my tiles and it was like a 98 point word or something ridiculous like that.
I laughed my evil, underworld laugh and then instantly felt guilty.
The computer must have felt pretty bad, too, because it started spelling easy, sucky words like, "cat," and "for."
So I won. I finally "Won on the Medium Level!" And I did it by cheating.
Who cheats on Phone Scrabble? I've never cared about winning in my life, just having fun! But there was something about being referred to as "Player 1" instead of by name. Something about the phone relentlessly winning with no apology. Something about the glare of the crimson screen...
Enough. I need to get a life. And do some word game practice thingies to build up my vocabulary. Geez...
Friday, November 20, 2009
It's Friday & The Shred is Really Freaking Hard
I am always surprised at how quickly my weeks tumble by. Mondays feel like the longest day of the week. Tuesdays are non-days. Wednesdays make me realize that "Holy Crap...I have a TON of stuff to get done before tomorrow! I have slacked the last two days!" Thursdays are about finishing things and in many cases, packing for the weekend away. Fridays are...well, just perfect. And exciting. I get to see Steinvic on Fridays. I usually don't have to work on Saturdays, so Friday feels like a big sigh. I love Fridays. It's like Christmas Eve for weekends.
I wasted an hour of last evening, (half) watching the (not so) Real Housewives of Orange County. I feel bad about that, as I've said before, but at least I spent a half hour before that with Jillian Michaels', doing my second day of Shred Part One.
If you need a wake up call to just how not-in-shape you really are, do this workout. It includes jumping jacks, "jumping rope" (there is no rope...you pretend), pushups, diffent crunches, and a variety of lungey-type exercises. You also need some hand weights, because you'll do some squatty things and some lifty, arm-raisey things.
When you are finished, you will temporarily hate Jillian Michaels. But then, as you find that you really will be able to take the stairs once again (after your muscles stop protesting), you will like her again.
I learned from a colleague that Jillian apparently swears at overweight clients on The Biggest Loser. I have never seen this show (yes, I watch the Not Real Housewives, but not reality shows with actual goals or substance) but I can't imagine her screaming at someone about his or her "f***ing fat a**," which I guess was an exact quote because this colleague used it a few times in her description of Michaels' behavior. (Actually, she used it enough that I wanted her to stop, lest a passerby think she was calling me that...in which case I would have had to slap her loudly to defend my honor...)
Anyway, I'll let you know how this 30-Day Shred program works out for me. You're supposed to do it every day, but I won't be doing it on Fridays. Fridays are mine. I love them and they don't include early wake-ups for working out or pre-Steinvic-arrival work-outs. That is just how I roll. Hopefully, the Shred will still work for me and at the end of the month I will be...shredded. (That's a good thing, right?)
I wasted an hour of last evening, (half) watching the (not so) Real Housewives of Orange County. I feel bad about that, as I've said before, but at least I spent a half hour before that with Jillian Michaels', doing my second day of Shred Part One.
If you need a wake up call to just how not-in-shape you really are, do this workout. It includes jumping jacks, "jumping rope" (there is no rope...you pretend), pushups, diffent crunches, and a variety of lungey-type exercises. You also need some hand weights, because you'll do some squatty things and some lifty, arm-raisey things.
When you are finished, you will temporarily hate Jillian Michaels. But then, as you find that you really will be able to take the stairs once again (after your muscles stop protesting), you will like her again.
I learned from a colleague that Jillian apparently swears at overweight clients on The Biggest Loser. I have never seen this show (yes, I watch the Not Real Housewives, but not reality shows with actual goals or substance) but I can't imagine her screaming at someone about his or her "f***ing fat a**," which I guess was an exact quote because this colleague used it a few times in her description of Michaels' behavior. (Actually, she used it enough that I wanted her to stop, lest a passerby think she was calling me that...in which case I would have had to slap her loudly to defend my honor...)
Anyway, I'll let you know how this 30-Day Shred program works out for me. You're supposed to do it every day, but I won't be doing it on Fridays. Fridays are mine. I love them and they don't include early wake-ups for working out or pre-Steinvic-arrival work-outs. That is just how I roll. Hopefully, the Shred will still work for me and at the end of the month I will be...shredded. (That's a good thing, right?)
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
A List of Things (because we love lists...)
1. I don't really know if that missing contact is still in my eye or not. It is irritated on and off, but mostly off. Like 95% of the time off. So that makes me think it dropped out and I just didn't see it.
2. The couple who owns my favorite Chinese restaurant slipped a note in my last order that said they were going to close from November 21 - November 30. What? How could they do this? No tofu or veggie lo mein for like...days. I might die. Actually, I think it's nice that they are able to take a break! We all need a break, right? But I will miss my tofu...
3. The news that women should wait to have mammograms or only have them ever so often or not do at-home-self-exams is shocking and stupid. I know three women at work who each had breast cancer before age 50 - two found during annual mammograms, one found through self exam. The one colleague ended up having a double mastectomy and she is 100% in remission now, but still under age 50, for the government's information. Tell one of these ladies that they should have waited! Now, as a result of the findings in this "study," insurance plans will probably drop this as a paid-for preventative care option. Thanks, government-task-force-loser-jack-asses...
4. If you haven't seen the new dark comedy series, Bored to Death, which is on HBO, do it. It's really good.
5. We may have found a place for our wedding reception. This weekend, we'll put together a guest list and set a date. On the 27th, we'll check out the reception place. It's coming together...
A short list today! More later...
2. The couple who owns my favorite Chinese restaurant slipped a note in my last order that said they were going to close from November 21 - November 30. What? How could they do this? No tofu or veggie lo mein for like...days. I might die. Actually, I think it's nice that they are able to take a break! We all need a break, right? But I will miss my tofu...
3. The news that women should wait to have mammograms or only have them ever so often or not do at-home-self-exams is shocking and stupid. I know three women at work who each had breast cancer before age 50 - two found during annual mammograms, one found through self exam. The one colleague ended up having a double mastectomy and she is 100% in remission now, but still under age 50, for the government's information. Tell one of these ladies that they should have waited! Now, as a result of the findings in this "study," insurance plans will probably drop this as a paid-for preventative care option. Thanks, government-task-force-loser-jack-asses...
4. If you haven't seen the new dark comedy series, Bored to Death, which is on HBO, do it. It's really good.
5. We may have found a place for our wedding reception. This weekend, we'll put together a guest list and set a date. On the 27th, we'll check out the reception place. It's coming together...
A short list today! More later...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
